Time For A Romantic Getaway?

Don’t just plan trips together around your vacation time. Make sure you’re both ready for it first.

By Marcia Jedd

ou’re happily dating someone and the relationship is still new. You picture the two of you on a romantic weekend at a country bed and breakfast, or cavorting on a no-holds-barred escape to a lush tropical resort. Or, you simply want to ask your date to attend a wedding in another city, or to go along with you on a business trip.

Whatever the trip, when is the right time in the
It’s not about timing by the calendar in deciding to take a trip together…
relationship to go out of town together? Consider these stories before making yor decision...

Are you both emotionally ready?
Amber, 41, felt that when she and her boyfriend went on a romantic getaway over a long weekend that taking a trip together forced their relationship to fold a bit prematurely. The couple went to New Orleans to celebrate her birthday and Valentine’s Day weekend. During the trip, Amber noticed that her boyfriend withdrew from their three-month intense relationship. “It’s not about timing by the calendar in deciding to take a trip together; it’s where each of you are mentally and emotionally,” she advises. Upon their return home to a Midwestern city, the couple dated for a few weeks before he called it off.

Traveling together can kick your relationship into high gear
After four months of steadily dating, Dan, 48, said it felt natural to plan a vacation together with his girlfriend. “After looking at options, we decided on a week in Mexico at an all-inclusive resort. We celebrated our six-month anniversary on the trip and had an absolutely fabulous romantic getaway
If it feels right to travel together, chances are, it is.
completely lost in each other,” Dan says. In fact, the vacation went so well that the couple is now engaged. “It was the best trip either of us had ever taken,” he says.

If it feels too soon, don’t force it
Misty, 43, recalls being a bit too pushy in suggesting to her boyfriend in the first few weeks of their relationship – before it had turned physical – that they both go to an upstate resort for a night or two one autumn weekend. “I got the bug to leave town and pushed him a bit to agree to go with me, but he didn’t take the bait. I couldn’t find a place to stay, anyway. The timing wasn’t right then and I knew it,” she says. The couple has since gone on a number of local and long-distance trips together. “These trips have all worked well,” Misty concludes.

The moral of these true travel tales:
  • When in the early stages of a relationship, it can be premature in the relationship to suggest a trip.
  • On the other hand, if it feels right to travel together, chances are, it is.
  • In an established relationship, have a discussion on what places or activities interest both of you most. Select dates which are convenient to you both. Book it!
Be ready to come home from a trip knowing that your bond is stronger or, if your trip together didn’t go smoothly, that you might have gotten farther apart.

Marcia Jedd is a freelance writer based in Minneapolis.
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